New To SSM II

[Delil@h]

COG,
Remember the post that started our Friendship awhile back. About me not being able to just let go IN THE BEDROOM ? Well Wednesday was my H birthday and he flew in that day ... and I made sure I was as X-rated in a Hot wife sexy kind of way I could be. I remember still what you posted that day and shortly thereafter and I had a few glasses of Wine and listened to Music and just relaxed and got myself beautiful for my H. I was going to be his Birthday Present....
In the past I was worried is the house clean , blah , blah , blah. Like he would care if the house was clean instead of being blown away by his Wife in bed!!

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ,That day I just focused on how to blow his mind and nothing else. HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGEEEEEEEE 180 for me.
I think I have finally reached my Goal and I was able to just really let go and not let "other stuff " or the Memory of " ow " get in the way. I do believe I gave my H a birthday he will not soon forget.
MOST of the details are too graphic to put on here I think but I will say that I went to the Airport in a sexy , very sexy dress with lots of cleavage and OOOPPPS!!! no panties.... ( left my jacket on in the Airport Didn't want to get arrested for too much cleavage LOL)

When we got into the car he discovered my little "suprise birthday present" ... and his response was " OOOOOOOH you are a bad A$% B&*ch!!!" he was impressed to say the least!!!!!! Just the response I was hoping for.
So I wanted to say thank you soooooooooooooo much. What you said to me and how you have given me 2x4's has helped me grow so much and just let go. I am very blessed to have you in my life. Thanks....
Being a Bad A$% B**ch is way better than being told I am frigid.
LOVE, Ali

[COG]

Ali,

You are a dream woman! What a wildcat! You're H is so lucky. God Bless You for letting go of the shackles that bound you. Jealousy, anxiety, fear, selfishness, neediness, all that stuff aside, and what pops out, a seductive woman!

Trust me when I say this, if every woman treated her man the way you treated your H, there would be half the D's there are today. Ali, I am so proud of you, and so happy for you too. Nothing else matters except the chemistry that YOU created. This never would have happened if YOU had not been willing and able to take a risk, let go your childish self centerdness, and allow your body and soul the frolic you and your H both need.

Can you put your magic in a bottle and send some to my W, to all W's?

I am just beside myself at what you did. You have no idea how far you just took your M. To new heights, over the top, WOW!!! You've just set a new standard for women.

Calling all women! If you want a new man in your H, just meet him at the airport like Ali did. You'll have them eating out of the palm of your hands, instead of eating at OW's house. (There's always exceptions of course, but not many)

God Bless,

COG

[COG]

Ali,

Things like a clean house, kid's in order, pets fed, homework done, money in the bank, don't mean squat to us men in comparison to being met at the airport and seduced on the way home. Truly a dream come true.

You've just conjured up in me the vision of a real woman. Not the brave, strong, efficient, and sometimes ruthless business woman portrayed on TV. The brave, strong, seductive, and sexual woman that God created. All I can say again is, WOW!!

You H is going to bend over backwards for you. He'll do anything for you now. He's a new man thanks to you! Nice work!

Love,

COG

[Delil@h]

You are such a sweetheart. I hope you have a Fabulous week,,, do something nice for yourself !
..... hope you are doing well. I posted to you in my thread...
Love, Ali

[Delil@h]

Thank you soo much COG.. I had an awesome post and I just cant seem to get a hang of this Laptop my Hubby got me @ a month ago. I seem to close the window w/o even knowing.. I do this almost every time I post.UUUGGGHHH!
And the words were just flowing . Well I will see if I can start over.
I am truly starting to see the power there is in truly giving myself to my H. I used to hold onto my fear for dear life and not let go my knuckles were white for God's sake!
I really am and I am so tired of having to either be a GOOD WIFE WHO DOES THE LAUNDRY, DUSTS THE WOOD WORK AND GOES TO THE GROCERY STORE OR THE *(&& WHO LIKES TO HAVE A GOOD TIME IN BED TOO.
I too like your wife have a Mother who says that SEX is dirty and she still does now that I am a grown Woman. How sad. I for one am so tired of it. Also I was sexually abused as a child and so those demons were there too. I really thought I had dealt with those long ago but I see that the memories tortured me to think sex is dirty too. And what kind of person am I if I enjoy F*&*()ng... now and again. What kind of person does that make me? A d*mn good WIFE is what it makes me.

I am sooo tired of the pressure that society, well meaning relatives, friends and family put on a Woman that you cannot be a good wife and excellent and hot in bed too. NO wonder there is so much unhappiness in Marriages. MINE INCLUDED.

I thought I crossed that barrier a long time ago but I only tip toed to it and never really crossed it. I have read Passionate Marriage and I also want to get SSM by MICHELLE,,, I read an AOL article on this book and I need it like I need the air I breathe. The 15 points they made described me too much and I wiil not refuse to go back to being scared of my sexuality or of how much power I as Woman have. NEVER! My H actually needs for me to be like this in order for him to shine.

I am starting to see this is what Monogamy is or should be HOT monogamy,, Afterall he is my H I have every right to "use " his body for my pleasure and give him pleasure that only I can because I am his Wife and it is my God given right to know his body and take him to Heaven every now and again. I am his Wife and only I can give this kind of pleasure what a good system..his body is mine to explore without fear and to give my Passion too w/o hesitation. I for one and tired of the Philosophy ..

Is it called the Madonna/Wh*re complex? That I cant go to the store come home and whip up the most fabulous food you have ever tasted and that is to be applauded but if I go to the store and buy a small bottle of wine and then come home and seduce my Husband until I am sweating and he is smiling like a little kid at Christmas... when does that get Praised?

I keep a good house and my kids are great too,,,, awesome but this new found sensuality I am going to embrace this more.

My MOM and many others have made me feel sex is dirty and even dirtier if you are thoroughly enjoying yourself. A GOOD CATHOLIC WIFE WOULD NEVER DO THAT!!!!
I used to always say that being Married is a Luxury and now even more so when I realize it is a sacred act to please my H they way only, I his Wife can.....
I CAN and will be both an awesome Wife and also my husbands best and most awesome lover ever, for ever!!!!

Sad really that we as Women are taught so may negative things or NOTHING at all @ SEX.
When it is vital like the air we breathe for a Marriage to grow and thrive. And NO, NOT Porn style or Olympic Marathon style sessions all though those are fun! Just real ML and real Passion kinda like the got milk adds.. GOT SEX? 2 minutes , 2 hours as long as we can really be NAKED / VULNERABLE and give who we are then we have arrived,, really arrived.
IT is the year 2007 and many of us Women are still living like it is 1940.... it is really hard to let go and be who you need to be when evryone is critiquing ( SP? ) you. You know what my body gave birth to 5 kids and is not perfect like the ones in The Magazines but I dare say I have more sensuality than those stick figures. AND IT TOOK ME FAR TOO LONG TO GET HERE AND I STILL HAVE A LONG ROAD AHEAD ACTUALLY. But I am going to get there and feel damn beaufiful the whole way. I am tired of listening to others , if I say I am sexy ,, I AM. IT IS A STATE OF MIND NOT A SIZE AND DEFINITELY NOT AN AGE EITHER!!!
God bless....

[COG]

Friends,

Alright well remember that babydoll nighty that I ordered for my W. Well I think the mailman brought it home for his W because it has'nt shown up yet. So they're sending another one that should be here in a few days.

I need a little help. Question is, how should I give this to her?

If things were hot and sweaty between us it would be easy, but given our relatively frigid circumstances, I'll be on a little thin ice with this.

One thing I'm pretty sure is that it won't help me to have any expectations of ever seeing her in it. My gut tells me I need to just give it to her and tell her to have fun with it. Then just walk away or something.

I think the wrong thing would be to light candles, and perfume the room all romantic like to give it to her. That would put her on the spot and make it real uncomfortable.

So all ideas are appreciated.

Thanks,

COG

[Greeneyedlass]

COG,

If it were me, I'd just leave it for her spread out on the bed with a note on it that says something like "saw this in a catalog and just had to get it for you...Love, COG" Short, sweet, nothing flowery, non-commital...maybe leave a flower with it....then don't bring it up at all. Don't mention whether she should wear it for you, or that you might like to see her in it, don't tell her to have fun with it...just keep it short and simple.

[cjhoffy]

I agree with GEL. Maybe a note would be okay, too. One that says something like "Try this on if you like; but I don't have to see you in it until you are ready." Something that lets her know that you don't expect to see her in it unless she wants you to see her in it.

[Greeneyedlass]

No offense CJ but I wouldn't even bother telling her "but I don't have to see you in it until you are ready." I would steer clear of anything like that actually...it's a subliminal pressure.

If it's a gift, keep it at a gift.

[cjhoffy]

No offense taken GEL. My thought was that there might be a subliminal message that she is expected to let COG see her in it and whether that would offend her.