I agree that she is mad at me for not having sex more and blames the lack of children on me. She is very resentful toward me -- and has said so.
But if children was her primary goal, would she not be "hunting" a new man as fast as she could? She's 40.
I'm not sure who diagnosed her. She has always had difficulty with her weight, difficult periods, facial hair, probably not ovulating and insulin issues.
She has always gone back and forth about kids. Sometimes she wants to have them, sometimes not, sometimes she wants to adopt, etc.... When we tried to adopt, I was the one who did the most the two little girls that lived with us for over a year. She because jealous of them. It was very difficult. At one point the CASA (court appointed special advocate) wanted me to leave my wife and take the kids by myself. It was a hard spot to be in. The CASA had no business doing something like that. I would find it very hard to adopt now days, knowing how the system can treat you. I thought I was doing the right thing and the girls loved me and where happy. I tried to keep everything together, especially my marriage during this time. Eventually, since I would not "choose", they took the girls away from us. Please don't misunderstand me, I think my wife is a very good person. She was in a very difficult position being judged by the CASA and the girls' grandmother. They were two very controlling women and down right mean and difficult to my wife. Looking back on it, I should have sent the girls packing immediately when they started messing with my marriage. But I thought I could make it work.
The funny thing about it all, was that I thought I was doing a good thing for my wife and thought that she wanted me to agree to try to adopt the girls. It was her idea at first and I jumped in and worked hard to make it all work -- for her!!
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MJ, I'm not sure I understand what you mean by your statement:
"perhaps just because she has the tendency to infantalize you in a way that depletes the emotional energy she could give to the task of having a real baby."
