You've changed A LOT since your first post. You are becoming stronger and more sure of yourself.
I can't tell you what she is really thinking/feeling, however, I think if you stay on the track you're on, you'll be fine. Just wait and see what "the letter" says and wait and see how things pan out.
I found that not talking R and just continuing on loving them is the best way. It's not always easy, you want to know what they're thinking & feeling NOW, but patience is the key.
Me: 38 H: 35 S4, S5, S10 Bomb 01/07 Wanted D - nothing would change his mind Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb Piecing 04/07 Deployed for a year 05/07 Still Piecing 2010 M 11 yrs 05/10