When I get a chance, I may post some of those e-mails here. You will be stunned that we openly faced -- and committed to work on -- these exact same issues back then. Some people go thru their whole lives never even acknowledging their problems, must less communicating to their spouses, and committing to work on them.
We've done it 3 times since 2001, and yet we're now to separating or divorcing than ever.
Sorry Choco. Good luck today. I know what you mean about having cycles of addressing the issues and then quickly falling back into bad patterns. Like Nop said, there's no magic to it, just hard work. LFL
