Heather...."If I stay in the house, my life at home will be dictated by how my H chooses to 'let me' be." Ummm sweetie, that's bull pucky!
It is only this way if YOU choose to allow it. He can bitch, moan, and complain about it if you don't go along with how he wants to "let you be", but the only one who will allow him to control your behavior in that manner is YOU. If you stop allowing it, the choices in the marriage (as to leaving or staying) become his to make too.
BE YOU, BE THE WAY YOU WANT TO BE, BE THE WOMAN YOU ARE and be genuine to yourself. It's up to him to deal with that person or not. If he doesn't like it, then he has options open to him.
Personally, I'm with NOP's I think you need to tackle the bedroom issue. Move yourself back in there...don't ask, just do it. If he makes an issue of it tell him that this is part of "recommitting" to this marriage. The space between you must be closed up.
