The intimacy dept. is a hard one when we are kind of "programmed" not to see ourselves "that way." When and if you can change your thinking is when you can step out of your comfort zone. I guess for me it was the thought of losing my H and the thought of OW (plural) finding him attractive, sexy, etc., I realized how sexy & attractive I found him and how much I actually enjoyed sex and how different it was and obviously more enjoyable when I could just let go and let it be instead of "thinking" too much.

I guess for me too it was the way I was raised to see and think about sex. My parents acted like it was something dirty -- they would actually fast-forward through sex scenes in movies even when I was older b/c it would embarrass them.

There are a lot of hang-ups for women when it comes to sex. I don't think C is always necessary. If you can see where your thinking is coming from and how you got to how & why you got to that thinking, you can sometimes reverse it or begin to see things differently.

Sometimes too if you just DON'T think so much, that works too. Just some thoughts on the intimacy/sex hang up that we seem to share.

Me: 38
H: 35
S4, S5, S10
Bomb 01/07
Wanted D - nothing would change his mind
Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb
Piecing 04/07
Deployed for a year 05/07
Still Piecing 2010
M 11 yrs 05/10