I've just got through reading your thread. Wow! Well you are right in the fray and going strong. WTG.
You said I still have a hard time figuring out where "leading" ends, and "controlling" begins tho.
Leading means you doing what you want; controlling means forcing her to.
There's lots of things you can do to woo her and not seem needy or grabby.
Be playful/happy around the kids so she sees playful happy Choc, not grumpy Choc. This might be easier to do than being that way just for her right now.
I don't know how things work out with chores etc in the Choc household but step up to the plate with full willingness on any of the chores that are yours, don't show any signs of reluctance or tiredness etc.
Protect her at all times, this can be as simple as getting the kids to cut it out if they are being disrespectful or immediately helping her with any heavy work. She's the little woman and you are the big man - make her feel that.
And as Stig said:
I would suggest you start by giving your W loving smiles when you come home or run into her out and about. I'm sure you did this every time you saw her when you first started dating, no?
Don't take too much notice of her reactions. Don't let them throw you off your plan.
I wish you all the luck in the world
Fran
if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs Erica Jong
