Honestly, I don't think you were intentionally meaning to be insensitive, which is why I pointed out the comment I felt was.
Thanks for your well wishes though, I'd love for that to happen someday, but honestly if it doesn't....my marriage is in a MUCH better place now than it ever has been.
Ok, so our next C appointment is Friday and I thought it would be a good idea to bring the subject up with H about whether or not to stick with this guy or tell him we need to move on to someone more qualified.
So, tonight at supper I bring the subject up and ask H what he thinks about the whole thing and whether or not we should approach the subject on Friday. H totally agrees that he is not qualified and there is no sense wasting our money with this guy when we should be spending it more wisely. So, decision is made! Then said to H that ST is much further from home and how are we going to work appointments out with his schedule and mine (being we already have difficulty and the current C is 5 minutes from home). H says not to worry my pretty little head about it, we will work something out
Friday we will tell C to please refer us to ST and see what happens from there
Heywyre
M - 57 H - 65 1st A-bomb - Nov 27/02 2nd A-bomb - Dec 13/06 together 21 years *************************** Insanity is doing something over and over and expecting different results (Albert Einstein)
Awesome, girl, awesome!!! I am so very happy for you two.
Me: 38 H: 35 S4, S5, S10 Bomb 01/07 Wanted D - nothing would change his mind Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb Piecing 04/07 Deployed for a year 05/07 Still Piecing 2010 M 11 yrs 05/10
thank you, thank you CM - I am pleased also (to say the least).
I finally feel as though we are moving forward and its such a relief. Cell bill should be coming in tomorrow or the next day too so I am trying not to stress out too much about that. H seems pretty calm about showing me the visa and cell bills so I would think that is a good sign.
Onwards and upwards
Heywyre
M - 57 H - 65 1st A-bomb - Nov 27/02 2nd A-bomb - Dec 13/06 together 21 years *************************** Insanity is doing something over and over and expecting different results (Albert Einstein)
Thanks GEL - yes, that's exactly what I thought too. He never even flinched or hesitated. He just said he totally agreed with me that he wasn't qualified to handle our problem and that we should move sooner than later.
He has been in such a happy place the last week its great - its as if the pressure has finally lifted from his shoulders and he is free to move forward. This, of course, has made my life a whole heck of a lot easier too.
He just came into my home office and gave me a hug and said "my sweet wife, you have been such a patient girl, thank you" - he can still make my heart melt after all these years
Heywyre
M - 57 H - 65 1st A-bomb - Nov 27/02 2nd A-bomb - Dec 13/06 together 21 years *************************** Insanity is doing something over and over and expecting different results (Albert Einstein)
Heywyre I bet we all would like that type of cooperation from our respective spouse. W/M or what ever. He is willing to talk about it and sounds like he wants a solution/s too.
It isn't the marrital problems that depresses many posters. It's the lack of cooperation/movement/improvement that I see as the problem.
He just came into my home office and gave me a hug and said "my sweet wife, you have been such a patient girl, thank you"
^5 to your H.
I can hug my W, no problem. I don't think I can say the "sweet wife part." You deserve the "sweet wife" compliment.
Thanks Lou - the "cooperation" part has been VERY slow coming but we are definitely starting to reep the benefits. It is like a HUGE lightbulb has finally come on in his head and he has something to strive towards.
He has been telling me for soooooo many years that he has always "searched" for as long as he can remember but doesn't know what he's searching for. Maybe, just maybe, that will come to an end too
(and thanks for the compliment )
Heywyre
M - 57 H - 65 1st A-bomb - Nov 27/02 2nd A-bomb - Dec 13/06 together 21 years *************************** Insanity is doing something over and over and expecting different results (Albert Einstein)
Congrats! What a turnaround for you from a couple of months ago. Just knowing that your H is connected, and willing to seek advice and education is a fantanstic blessing. And good for you for being such a great friend and support for him. Nice work!
Love,
COG
PS Keep an open mind because I'm sure there's much for YOU to learn in this, AND keep your expectations low. God Bless You!
My Story http://www.divorcebusting.com/forum...&Number=660444&page=2#Post660444
Thanks COG - yes, it has been quite the turnaround hasn't it? However, just like the actor that was an "overnight success" it has been a very long and tiring battle over many years really.
I think the BIG turning point was when H realized he just didn't want to live like this anymore, regardless of what happened between "us". He knew there was no more running, hiding, covering up. He had to face his demons once and for all, for his own sanity. I am just glad that I stuck it out and am there to be by his side to get him/us through this.
He is a wonderful man and the thought of him not being in my life was much more painful than what we have been through. I am glad I hung in there.
I know this is far from being the end of it - I think of it more as a real beginning for us. It will take time, patience and a lot more hard work but at least we are on the right path, that in itself is a blessing for sure
Heywyre
M - 57 H - 65 1st A-bomb - Nov 27/02 2nd A-bomb - Dec 13/06 together 21 years *************************** Insanity is doing something over and over and expecting different results (Albert Einstein)
