Chicki - you seem to be procrastinating on the things you need to do to make sure you are looking after yourself and your children. Forget the realty attorney - you need a family law specialist - a divorce lawyer, to make sure you are protected when the house sells.
I understand how difficult it is to admit to yourself that it's at the stage you need a divorce lawyer, but honestly there is little indication from your H that he is interested in reconciling or living according to your 'open marriage' plan. He plans to sell the house - and then where are you and the children going to be?
Please contact a laywer and get your affairs in order so you can make sure you get what you are entitled to when the house goes on the market.
V
Never make someone a priority, who makes you an option.
WB gave you good advice. If you have kids and are the primary caregiver, you can probably block a house sale for now. As far as the deed vs financial stuff, it doesn't matter who is on the loan paperwork. He either needs you to sign or have power of attorney to sell without you.
Hang in there. Remember, you do not want him back out of obligation, you want him to want to come back. You cannot stop him from going. Read back in a previous thread of mine, (#7), I linked a couple articles on 5-12-07. Read them.
Me: 44 S: 17 and 7 Final-6-13-08 I once went to a psychic who told me I would soon feel cheated......
I wonder how long he has to be "gone" out of the house in order for it to be considered "abandoning" us. I wonder if he thought of that and thats why he would come back if even for a day or two.He has not "technically" moven out, what I mean is all his stuff and belongings r still there. I think his lawyer (wanna be)student of a GF has been feeding him a bunch of legality stuff. He knows way too much than what he knew before. It seems when he stays over there he comes back meaner and doing things he would not normally do. BUT oh well, I guess I will be jsut another divorcee statistic soon:(
What is he telling you now as far as the D goes & selling the house etc.?
Me: 38 H: 35 S4, S5, S10 Bomb 01/07 Wanted D - nothing would change his mind Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb Piecing 04/07 Deployed for a year 05/07 Still Piecing 2010 M 11 yrs 05/10
Nothing has changed from last week when he handed me the papers and I have yet to sign them. iI will tell the lawyer I had no idea he was so far behind ( he really did not tell me)even though this is what he does he waits 3 months and then plays catch-up.BUT I have a feeling he had other intentions this time around to leave us hy and dry!
I did not get a response from my last email. If he puts the sign out tonight, I will just take it off! What ya think guys? He si no longer stying w/ us, so he won't know unless he drives by over the weekend or something. His GF house is far from us going the opposite side of town and she keeps very close tabs on him especially if he stays too long w/ us.
Had my first weekend in a very long time to myself and a GF went out of town and it was grrrrrreat! When my h brought the girls back he asked me tons of questions who was I with, etc. I told him he lost the right to be questioning me about my whereabouts and he doesn't care anyways, h- yes I do care (whatever). H has been acting weird since I told him I am ready to start dating,H- hell no! It's too soon for you! WTF? Her's teh confusing part- in one sentence he asks if I had signed the D papers and when I say it will be notorized and ready tomorrow H then says I want to move back in(it's only been two weeks)! Then proceeds to give me three kisses and three ILY's!! Poor boy is so confused......
This morning he argues w/me when I told him he did not have to show for his D9 bday and I will ask if she wants him ther..BOY!I don't know why I thought u could change,blah blah I said whats the deal w/ you? She's my d I want to be ther! I said yeah,but I thought y wanted to celebrate w/ you new "family". H-I don't want you or her all I want is to be left alone w/ only me and my kids!!!(yeah right) MR NO PATIENCE W/ THEM WHATSOEVER.
I told him I understood and thats why I am letting him go & to come by 2night to pick up the papers. H- whatever, sure.....AHHHHH UGH......cookoo cookoo
i am feeling like tonight will be the 'breaking' point w/ us when I see how H reacts to actually having reality staring in his face when I give him the signed papers that he thinks I have been dragging my feet on. So, wish me luck!! Pray he does not turn psycho on me like last week w/ the death threats!!
H did not show. He is the one who was puching me to hurry and sign the papers. Well I did and told him to come pick it up. Don't you think if was so eager he would rush to come get it and then go celebrate his freedom w/ OW?
Today he has me blocked from his IM. WTH is going on that brain? I am tired of his mixed messages!
