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mcojh Offline OP
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Thanks DNQ, although today I don't feel like too much of an inspiration. My detachment is wearing on me. W called 2 or 3 times today, and never left a message. I want so badly to call her and talk, but I didn't.

This making her feel my absence is killing me.....It is wrong thinking, but I want to spend time with her so she cannot be with the FOM. I know that if she wants to be with the FOM, she will be, that I am the second fiddle right now.

On a positive note, I met the new receptionist at work today and she was kind of flirting with me. She had some of the nicest......eyes that I have seen in a while.

Another co-worker who I haven't seen in a while raved about how good I looked.

Smiling, sort of and waving.


Me: 44
S: 17 and 7
Final-6-13-08
I once went to a psychic who told me I would soon feel cheated......
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I still try to tell myself that the more time they spend together, the sooner everything is going to BLOW UP in their faces! Maybe that's just a fantasy I have but, it's just one of those things that keeps me going some days.

This morning I was yelling at God on my way in to work. Asking why HE wasn't doing anything about this.. *SIGH*

Hang in there.. That perky new receptionist probably has no idea how much her flirting with her "eyes" means right now. Good for you \:\)

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MC,
Hang in there, you are really doing great. Go back and re-read some of your posts from a while back if you need confirmation of this.

In the mean time, you know the routine, GAL and detach! Every day will get a little bit easier.
SD


Me 41
W 41
Kids: S9 S7
Married 16 years
Bomb dropped 2/2/07
Still living together!
current thread
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mcojh Offline OP
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S6's BBall game went well. W brought the boys. I had a really good time with the kids. I talked to the W in between innings and asked her for a sip of her pop. She willingly gave me some. After the game, she asked S6 if he wanted her to give him a ride home. He did, and she drrove him home. Why would she do this? She dropped him off and seemed like she wanted to talk. I herded S6 towards the house to get his shower started. I talked to her a little about tomorrow's schedule and said goodnight.

She called a little later to say that she forgot to send S6's lunch box with him earlier. I told her I didn't need it. She said several times that she would bring it by. I said no thanks.....have a good day tomorrow, good night.... It was hard not to let her come over, but I know I would have pursued.....

BTW, I talked to Theoden this afternoon. He is ok.


Me: 44
S: 17 and 7
Final-6-13-08
I once went to a psychic who told me I would soon feel cheated......
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 1,474
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Good to hear he's doing ok. I miss his wise words..

I've noticed that your W is always forgetting things and finding reasons to have you run something to the apt. or for her to come pick up something (like leftovers!). I get the feeling she's missing her life at home..

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mcojh Offline OP
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Thats what I thought too. If I was as out of the R as she wants people to believe, I would be a ghost unless I had to be around. I almost felt like she was trolling for an invite yesterday to go have a beer or something......


Me: 44
S: 17 and 7
Final-6-13-08
I once went to a psychic who told me I would soon feel cheated......
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,146
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Theo,
If you are lurking, we're thinking about you my friend.

SD


Me 41
W 41
Kids: S9 S7
Married 16 years
Bomb dropped 2/2/07
Still living together!
current thread
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,146
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MC,
Good job at knowing yourself and not putting yourself in a sitch where you will pursue/destroy the respect that W is starting to have for the new you! I know it is a tough balance, but until she really respects you, you will not be able to build a new, stronger M.
SD
SD

Last edited by SuperDad?; 05/16/07 04:27 PM.

Me 41
W 41
Kids: S9 S7
Married 16 years
Bomb dropped 2/2/07
Still living together!
current thread
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 625
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I agree with what Lovely Olive stated before - my whole intent for my H to have his apt was TO spend MORE time with OW - so he could start seeing the real her and their real issues. Not sure if that's how it played out but he did end up saying goodbye to her. We cannot stop them from seeing the OP - they will be togther despite our efforts - more enticing when it's forbidden...

Hang in their MC and keep working on you. I have fallen off the GAL train and started focusing too soon on my H and now he seems to be pulling away from me slightly. He is going for counseling next week - stuff he says would upset me at this point WTH???? He is supposed to move back home at the end of the month and NOW he starts getting wishy washy.... The kids know he's coming back too so we can't not go through without tears on their part. H says he needs to fix himself before he can work on us - whatever that means! I have started to detach again and put me first. It's just so tiring.... I am thinking about him taking the kids Friday and Saturday and me being alone for once...

Keep up the good work and just remember it's baby steps all the way....

HB


Me41 H44 * M16 yrs * D13 S10
8/06 H wants a D * 1/07 OW Truth
2/07 Searated * 7/07 H moved home
First Thread
Surviving Separation
Now Piecing

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SuperDad,

Thanks for asking.

I'm here. New job and all. Can't spend much time.

I've already written up my sitch. Gotta get some time at home to post it.

I talk with MC a lot. Frank a little.

In summary, I'm just really pissed off. But job is forcing me to not focus on the sitch.

--Theoden




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