Add to that, x may have started her toe testing the waters EA prior to our seperation, but only started the A after we were seperated. She found this very important to clarify when wanting to reconcil. Unless I interpreted incorrectly, I believe you said that was acceptable.
Only if you both agreed she could have an EA, and later see someone else after you seperated. Otherwise, no.
As for the rest - Blackfoot, we see the world through our own lenses, no matter how intelligent or intuitive we are. We can only extrapolate from our own experience to a degree, especially when it comes to relationships. I'm sure you made mistakes in your marriage. So did she. That doesn't mean you didn't learn plenty from the carnage, and it also doesn't mean you can't be a good husband to someone. Much of the dynamics of a relationship comes from the particular interaction of the two people in it. She, actually, has no real way of predicting what kind of a husband you'd now be to someone else.
A decade is a long time, yes. But if you're only about my age now, you must have both been very young. That matters. Since you didn't have children, I think you still have your 'perfect throw' ahead of you, for all that you think you already dropped it.
The world is grey. Light and shadows, often at the same time. The best you can do is chose which shade is yours, and retain compassion for others, and especially for yourself.
And of course you realize that I must take offense at your classifying my intelligence and intuition as "unknown". Don't they just shimmer through my posts? Sheesh.
