I feel lost tonite. It's 2am, I checked her cell phone, and she is deleting text messages now, but she talked to OM for 38 minutes today.
I know I'm not supposed to panic here. I know I'm supposed to "slowly insert myself into her life." But when I feel like I'm losing someone, how can I sit by while she does NOTHING new tonite (no kiss hello, no lingering touch by HER, no "hey, can we finish that conversation now," no ANYTHING different), but yet she turns to HIM for 38 minutes today?
She talked to me MAYBE two minutes on the phone today.
I'd love to think that she was telling him "I can't do this anymore," but I doubt it. I think I'm going crazy.
I know it's only one day, but I need to see SOME sort of response to my 2nd e-mail tomorrow. I took a big emotional risk -- the BIGGEST emotional risk one of us could have taken -- by breaking the "moral-equivalency" language of our first e-mail exchange and saying, basically, "OK, so we're both wondering 'Do I open up my heart, again, without knowing first how he/she feels?', so I'll go first -- I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH."
She needs to respond to that. I need her to respond to that.
