Thank you everyone for your replies. I am having a hard today and sometimes I ask "why?" The whole A still bothers me, as it should. It has been 3 months since I found out. I try to not let it get to me, but it still does. I keep telling myself focus on me and I do, but every now and then it comes back and today is one of those days. It is not necessarily because I want my H back, it is the fact of what has been done. Even if he wanted to come back, I don't think I could ever do it, knowing that his EA has turned into a PA. Plus, I cannot get over that she has slept in what used to be our bed.
My H was nice and got me a gift from the kids for Mother's day and text me a nice message about being a great mom. He also wished me a Happy Mother's Day on the day. I thought this was all generous, but then I always wonder if he is being nice for other motives, like the fact that we have mediation in a couple of days. He has been mostly cruel to me in the past months. His generosity is rare. I know that the only thing I have is time on my hands. It will be 6 months since we been seperated and when I think back to the first few months, I really like who I am now and just keep thinking that I can only progress. But like I said earlier, I am having one of those days.
