My W did the same thing too when I found out she was looking at apartments. She has been looking for a long time, but she is still here.
My advice - let her look. But please protect yourself anyway, like MC said, just to know your rights at a minimum. Your W is in the "fog" right now. She's right in the middle of it. Remember that. And it's a good thing not to let anyone else know about your activities on this board - it is here to help YOU.
~Sol
~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Single Dad, and luvin it! ~ Happiness is a state of mind ~
I really do not care to much about my W looking for an apartment.... I do care that my 2DD might start staying at a strange place were I cannot be there if they need me. She can look all she wants and educate herself all she wants. She might be surprised that I do not plan on sitting back and letting her control my life and our girls life with her irrational behaviour. I love my W dearly but this garbage has got to stop or she has got to go.
I have to admit that I basically woke up pissed off at my W this morning. She saw me and said good morning and I was so lost in my own thoughts that she needed to repeat herself for me to hear her. Today I keep thinking of my W as being a two timing floozy.. Just because she is the mother of my two girls I know it is not right to be thinking of her this way... But when the shoe fits....
Well I did what I did not want to do I gave my W the picture book. Actually I gave it to her on Wednesday during our heated discussion. She was telling me that I do not recognize her, blah, blah blah.... Dang it... She was not supposed to get that book.
Today my W brought the girls to her new church leaving me to go to church by myself. I then meet up with them, my IL's and my W sisters for brunch. Lunch was nice my W actually thanked me for lunch. She brought the picture book along to show everyone that was there. My MIL gave me a big long hug and told me that she loved me. To bad her daughter nolonger does. After lunch I brought my 2DD to my parents house and had a good time with them and my parents.
I do not know when this roller coaster will end but I think I may be climbing another big hill waiting to take another crazy plunge. I am just going to throw my arms in the air and try to make the most of it.
BTW, I am going to see another lawyer on Wednesday and really am contemplating filing for legal seperation at that time.
All indications from my W is that she is running to D. I really do not think that there is anything that I can do to stop her. She sent me an email today stating "I will do my best in communicating with you inregards to the girls, they need to live in peace even when we are not under the same roof."
She has not given any indication to me that she has any positive feelings for me or our M/R. I guess I have to take her advice and start getting used to the fact that there is no more us. It is just hard to stop dreaming about our future since everything prior to these last 5 months had our future at the center of it. BTW today an aniversary date of when the bomb was first dropped on me. I don't think she knows this, maybe she does.....
She has IC tonight, but, I nolonger hold out any hope that this is going to help our M. My W is finding herself and going to share it with the OM not me. You would think that a Christian Counseler would encourage my W to get me into counseling with her but that does not seem to be the case anymore. So much for her counseler being pro-marriage.
My W has always been a person that once she makes up her mind she acts and all appearances indicate that she has made up her mind. My hope has faded... I need to do what is best for me and my 2DD. This just means that things are going to get really ugly, we both are going to want full custody.
This again sucks.... I need to move on and start a new life without my W.
When i read your posts, I feel like i'm married to the same woman.
My wife is the same place, but instead of looking for apartments, she is house hunting. She doesn't want to feel "in limbo". She wants to move forward with her new life.
I know her too well, and i know that if we will ever have a chance in the future, she is going to have to ride this out all the way. Maybe once she has her new "more wonderful, fulfilling" life, she will realize what a good man i am, and remember all the good times she has decided to forget about.
My W just can't run away with the OM yet. He's also married. Wouldn't be a hoot if she gave up her family for him only to find out he is just a player and is unwilling to give up his?
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
Next, I feel the sameway. I think my W is going to have to ride this wave out to realize how good she had it. Knowing my W I am afraid that she is going to be rash and run off with OM. When she sees something she wants there is no stopping her. Not I or anybody else that loves her has any influence on my wife anymore.
Husband, the OMW filed for divorce so the bastard is going to be single again. The funny thing is that my W still thinks that he is the one that files for the D, when it actually was his W. Here is somemore funny info about the OM. I should not know all of this but his W tells me without me asking. Yeah, his W called me yesterday, atleast this time it was not in the middle of the night. Alright here it goes..... This dude has over 150K out in student loans, no savings, and his wife plans on taking everything that she can. So he is going to be broke for awhile. He is a member of some medical society and multiple papers or journals that he turned in as his own where actually written by his W. And this winner of a guy abandoned his family. Not to mention he and my W ignore patients in the ER while they are on the phone with each other for hours while at work. Great catch for my wife isn't he.
Hopefully I have not offend anybody by listing out this dudes faults that I know of. I have my problems to but it makes me feel better knowing how un-ethical this guy really is.
Sometimes it just feels good to vent about the crappy op. I know what you mean. H sees ow as the sweetest person in the world and her whole family thinks she's the biggest B ever! Plus, I know of lies she has told H. Double PLUS - multiple affairs during her marriage (which is soon to be over!). All this and she goes to church and acts like this sweet little Christian woman to my H... whatever... The OP and A fog just makes our S act like idiots!
