My heart has been completely torn apart

[I_Surrender]

Thanks very very much for the thoughts and responses.

I thought that things were going well today, starting with last night, when I took my youngest son out to buy her flowers and a mother's day card.
She seemed okay last night and then this morning. I gave her a hug this am, but her response was weak.
I went to give my mom a card and flowers this am, came back home and asked her if she wanted to go out, went to the mall I got a hair cut, then we went for a walk. That turned sour very quickly.
She has a lot of pent up anger, and blames me for everything.

I sat her down and asked her, didn't she consider that when she had the PA? Still she is mad that I "caused" all of this.

I am going to stay the course and be level and nice as I can. She is infuriated that I went to our GP for an STD test.

I hope very much that counselling helps her. I sent her a dozen red roses and a card for our 24 th anniversary which should arrive at her work tomorrow morning.

I regretted that today, since she was such a B about our relationship and kids.

To heck with it, I am going to take the high road as much as I can. It will hopefully help me learn to forgive her and myself, sooner and begin to heal faster.

Darn it really looks bad, she is such an angry person, I can't break that down.