That was so hard for me to read. It's hard when people that we love disappoint us and I need to toughen up where my in-laws are concerned.
I was very close to exh's family, although it didn't start out that way. I was always afraid of my MIL, she's pretty rigid and sometimes tyranical, but when I had my kids I made a decision to make a relationship with her. My FIL is the most wonderful man but he has alzheimers and I don't believe for a minute that he would have cut us loose.
Well so much to say and so little time.....My MIL had very little communication with my husband, actually it was all through me. She would call every Saturday, he wouldn't answer the phone and she wouldn't ask for him. I was guilty in that I didn't understand it yet I never called him on it. The samething went for his brothers. They would call me to ask questions or to just talk. The only time they really ever spoke was on someone's birthday or over the holidays. I think that I kept the connection so it was easier for everyone to overlook the fact that he never kept one. (funny how I can see it all so clearly now!)
When my husband first decided that he "needed to find" himself, they were all behind me and worried about the kids. As time went on it just became easier for them to not rock the boat. Everyone tried to tell me that this would happen, but I didn't want to believe it. I always say that if you they admit that he has a problem then they would have to deal with it and we couldn't have that.
So where does this leave my kids? Well since they won't speak to their Dad MIL has told me that they were nothing but spoiled brats and if it were up to her she would cut them off. Needless to say I haven't spoken with her since.
It's all been so hurtful, but I gotta' tell you, my kids have had the courage not to play her game and she doesn't much like it. To husbands family money is love. No emotion, no kisses, no nurturing (except when FIL was well)and my kids have been strong enough to say no thanks! I never had that kind of courage to stand up to my MIL, at least not until she hurt my babies.....
