ILH - you have no clue whatsoever what GEL and I (and possibly Passionate) is going through when it comes to our husbands. It is not solely about "turning it on" when the wife walks out the door. It has nothing to do with that. Our Hs have a disorder, complex, syndrome whatever you want to call it.

If I initiated sex with my H, I can guarantee that would be one sure way of him withdrawing even more, every single time. He detests it. Why? Because he does not see me as a sexual being, that disgusts him. He is not just LD, he has a mindset that needs to be reprogrammed

It has nothing to do with a power struggle - if it was, I would have had this taken care of a long, long time ago.

I applaud you for having sex 2-4X per week - I would be thrilled to death if I had that much a year!

This is not about just doing it, if it was, I would initiate every time, no problem.

Heywyre

M - 57
H - 65
1st A-bomb - Nov 27/02
2nd A-bomb - Dec 13/06
together 21 years
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Insanity is doing something over and over and expecting different results (Albert Einstein)