Yes, I agree with that completely, but his whole discussion of his sexual needs lately has wiped his little emotional affair off the table and that irks me.
It's all about what he's NOT getting, it seems. My strategy has been exactly what you said, to amp it up in my own way, be "into it."
So, I was reading up on the board, and looking forward to him coming home tonight (we'll be packing for a weekend out of town). I called him up while both kids were napping and just said I was thinking about him. I said I was looking forward to him coming home and wishing there was some way for the kids to give us some private time for a while. He said, "why what would you do?" Ok, another opportunity! I don't know why this stuff is hard for me. I giggled, paused, tried to say something, but couldn't, then finally said, "I don't know, what would you do?" with a big smile on my face. He wasn't having it though. Wanted to hear it from me. He said, "I'm at work, I'm just listening." I said, "That's hard for me, Joey." still smiling/giggling. He said, "Just tell me what you imagined." I said, "Then I'd have to use those words that I don't like." He said, "No, you don't have to say, Then I'd suck your cock! You could just say, then I'd go down on you and swirl my tongue around. . . " I giggled some more and TRIED. I said, "I'd just like to be in your arms and spend some time under the covers with you, maybe experiment with that sensual mist we bought." He wanted more, I said I couldn't. He heaved a big sigh, and that was the turning for me. I said, "Joey, I called you because I had positive feelings I wanted to share with you. I don't like feeling like I'm disappointing to you. He said he was sorry and he was just kidding, but I said, no you weren't kidding when you sighed like that. You wanted me to do something that is hard for me, but I was telling you in my own way that I am looking forward to being with you tonight! I think you've got it pretty good, but all you see is the negative. He said I was being moody, etc.
Anyhow, that's pretty close to what was said, and I just felt discouraged that 1) I can't just DO and BE what he wants and 2)He can't just be happy with me as I am! Grrr! ;(
