If this is not typical of his past managing of money, maybe you're right. Maybe he does want you to give up, and perhaps he's still in MLC and depression, and feeling overwhelmed by everything....
I think if I were in your shoes I'd put all the financial information on paper and with as little emotion as possible, show him that according to the finanical records he is having a problem with the finances and you need his help to figure out how to take care of it. Let's do this together. Somehow take control, but let him feel like he's still the "knight in shining armor" rescuing the day!!! Instead of telling him, ask him how, pin him to dates and try to be a positive team about fixing some of these problems. Perhaps that Mercedes and boat need to go...
Do you have your finances on a home expense program? If not, mention to your husband you think this would be worth trying since so and so has raved about it, and then ask for his help with it. Go over it weekly. Men like to fix things so if possible steer him towards feeling like he's helping you straighten things out and fix them.
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
