I hope today is a better day. I have to tell you I went to make an attempt once a very long time ago. And my ensuing thought was that my children deserve better than this.
About 6m later I found DB. And I have to tell you that was my light and it's why I'm here.
Michele and her work gave me the tools to get myself much more together and have a great life. It's over 6 years now and my life is wonderful.
Yours can be too.....stick with us, kid.
sg Love is PATIENT, love is KIND, LOVE never fails / DB since 2001
When we think about making a change, it can be scary. What is familiar is easier to deal with (as horrible as it may be) than the unknown.
What is your "WHY" or what is your "reason to" make the change?
When many Jews were in Nazi camps, in hellish conditions, "WHY" should they want to survive, to endure daily physical pain, horrible living conditions and emotional torture (each having lost many friends and or family members)?
For some it was a VOW to make sure nothing like that ever happended again. For some it was LOVE of family, to see loved ones again who were or might be safe. Each survivor has their own story as to what gave them the will to survive.
If your Son/Daughter (?) came to you bleeding from a wound that would kill them if you didn't get it treated would you let them bleed? Right now your family members need you to treat your wounds and then to treat theirs.
It may seem impossible, scary or not worth it but when you get to the other side, one day at a time, one step at a time, you will know you did the right thing.
Backing off from suicide was a BRAVE thing, not a "ball-less thing." You chose to face difficulties rather than end it and cause all kinds of misery for your children and their current or future children!.
Now take one step, then another, and then worry about the next step.
Bless you.
Committed2Him- "C2H" All Things (Back from Spain!)...18
Just came over to check on you. I'm hoping you have thought about and taken the advice to go to talk with someone. I also hope that today things aren't seeming so hopeless.
Glenda is right in saying the it takes more courage to keep going then it does to end it. You are a very courageous woman and a great Mom!
Take care of yourself and let us all know how you're doing.....
thank you, i am reading ur posts and my logical mind is saying u dont need this,i am really messed up. so frightened that getting doctors involved will inpact on my job, it's a catch 22.
Getting doctors involved will NOT impact your job, it will benefit YOU and your job. Your employers do not have the right to know what is going on in your personal life.
Just like you would go to the doctor for a yearly physical or some medical problem you are having, do you tell your employer about that? This is your mental health you are talking about, nothing different.
You need to do what is best for YOU - please, seek some help from your family physician. They take an oath of confidentiality and cannot reveal anything to anyone, unless they have YOUR consent and/or it is threatening the life of someone.
Heywyre
M - 57 H - 65 1st A-bomb - Nov 27/02 2nd A-bomb - Dec 13/06 together 21 years *************************** Insanity is doing something over and over and expecting different results (Albert Einstein)
i was in a very dark place the other night and i am sorry that i worried u all. i am not ok and i realise that now, both me and my husband r depressed, the problem is i have had to cope with his depression over the past 11yrs and i am now having to take on too much. it is all too much but i am going to change things.......just reading ur responses has changed me...thank you. drinking is the biggest issue i am going to tackle first, i know this but it so helps me forget our problems, i feel ashamed cos i am intelligent and should know better. if i get my drinking under control i can then tackle the relationship.
Your drinking is your way of removing yourself from the pain. This is common, however, as you know, not the best solution
As you go through your healing, we will be here for you through your ups and downs. Please, lean on us and we will do whatever we can to help you through this very difficult time in your life
Heywyre
M - 57 H - 65 1st A-bomb - Nov 27/02 2nd A-bomb - Dec 13/06 together 21 years *************************** Insanity is doing something over and over and expecting different results (Albert Einstein)
I understand all about leaning on the drinking and then finding that it has become a problem. Seriously consider the AA even if you feel like you are "not one of them." You can go to a meeting and just sit quietly or if someone talks to you, you can just tell them you are there to check it out.
I promise you, you will find 100% unconditional acceptance- I am a committed Christian and I tell you, you can go to many churches and not find 100% acceptance some times.
As others have said, keep checking in here and you will find others who have been in deep pain and many who still are in such pain BUT you will notice there is a lot of hope and lots of good happening in people's lives.
Blessings to you.
Keeping you in my prayers.
Committed2Him- "C2H" All Things (Back from Spain!)...18
