Whore/Madonna

[Heywyre]

Thanks everyone for all the support - it truly helped me while talking to him knowing you were rooting for me

I remember some more things I told him (hope you don't mind me gloating a little more :))

When he said he didn't know why I couldn't move on I used a version of what you said GEL. I told him "for a year while you were having your A, you were dealing with the guilt and pain of it. But now that it is out in the open and not a secret anymore, you are able to release it and move forward. However, all I had were suspicions that were being suppressed during that same time period and now that the "secret" has been exposed, I am just starting to deal with it. Where you have had over a year to sort things out in your mind, I am just beginning"

We also talked about his yelling fit and he said he didn't yell at me and that he was "just expressing" himself. I responded with "that was not an "expression" it was your frustration and scars from your past that was talking and I didn't deserve that treatment". I then went on to say, "you used to tell me I cam first in your life, and now I don't know where I fit in".

He says, "well, I'm here aren't I". I said, "yes you are here in body but if you don't want to do what's necessary for me to heal from the pain you have caused, then that also tells me a lot about where I fit in your life". Silence

I have also noticed lately that he puts his hand up to cover his mouth a lot, and plays with his moustache. That is a CLEAR sign of someone that is nervous - and he should be because he doesn't know how determined I am now. I have found a new sense of strength in all of this and I am moving forward and no one is going to stop me. If he's lucky, I will let him come along for the ride. If not, then he can wallow in his own self pity and miss out on all the fun