You're right that's the last thing I need to do. I guess I'm mad and it's a way to strike back. Kind of "I'll show you."
It's the wrong thing to do, and I'm not that kind of person.
Today at my C's group session, we talked about the five stages of grief.
Denial - "this can't be happening to me"
Bargaining - begging....
Anger - fight back
Depression - hopelessness
Acceptance - accept the lost, not just try to bear it quietly
My C said that these 5 steps are universal. That many things are effected by culture, etc. but that people all greeve the same way. It was an interesting discussion.
I think that I've finished the first two, but I'm not sure where I'm at in the last three. It's almost like I'm looping thru the last three. Somedays more one than the other.
One good thing that's come out of all this, is that I really enjoy learning about psychology and how the mind works. Learning what other people are doing and how they are feeling.
I think that I understand myself much better now. And I also feel that I understand my wife better. Michelle's books have also helped so much. Things really do make much more sence than they ever did before.
It's also amazing how approaching things with an open/willing mind will allow you to see things better.
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I've talked with my wife three times this week by phone. Everytime she has cried. I think this is really hard on her. I think she loves me, but just can't bring herself to trust me that things will be different if she comes back.
C's don't fix things. They don't restore you to your previous state. They help you understand and grow. As you grow you become a different person. I think that I am becomming a better person and have changed a lot. I know that things will be different in the future with my wife or with someone else.
