Sol, What has struck me lately when I peruse your posts is the bitterness and anger you hold towards W. This may be holding you back as understandable as those feelings are. I think that it is quite normal for us long termers to fall victim to our ego, our pride and the enormouse hurt we feel. Those little voices are always screaming "don't put up with this crap", "be a man, have some pride in yourself" etc. But, we can't DB when our thoughts are clouded with that anger, resentment and an ego that does not see beyond us! We become mired in our own hurt. Therefore, as I am discovering, we must look to LOVE. What action on my part will preserve or enhance love with this person? Many of us are parents and regardless of how our M's turn out we will ALWAYS be parents together. The only way to be the parents (and people) we want to be is through preserving love with our partner, in whatever from that may be. Look to love Sol, the answers are on that path. P.S. Tough love is still love but it cannot be done based on anger and seeking revenge. Put love back into your heart and the head will follow guiding you down the path you need to follow. Now, I just need to follow my own advice! Take care.
