Andyv, When my H first started his EA he would come home from work and talk about her all the time OW this and Ow said that, i got sick of hearing that and said something about it and he never mentioned her again. Over the following year he grew very distant and i asked him about it in Oct. and he told me he wasn't happy hadn't been for a while and had thought about leaving but that it scared him to death. I had found thank-you cards from her and her daughter and he told me it wasn't me it was him he thought he was having an MLC.i started DB'ing in Dec after finding this site. and things are much better than they were he even told me he loved me the other day and he hasn't said this in almost 2 years.
You can follow my sitch.There is hope you just have to learn to detach and become mysterious(vague) it does work. don't talk about the R unless she does first,at least until you have some kind of commitment that she wants to work on the R.
Since i have givin you advise i need to look at it to remind myself of my goals. It has been working for me but lately i have been thinking i need some answers to the last year and a half. and i think he's trying to brush it under the rug and i won't have that as i need to know some things to move forward.
Good luck to you and your marrige,
You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when, you can only decide how you're going to live now. ~Joan Baez
