Cat--THANK YOU for taking the time to share your thoughts with me. I have learned a ton from you over the last several months and will always think of you with respect and admiration.
Sigh. I keep looking for guarantees that everything will come together for my happy-ever-after, though I know that's not what life is truly about--I need to work more on getting rid of expectations and surrendering myself to seeking and following God's will for me. Worrying and obsessing over H's commitment or lack thereof is in essence displaying my own lack of faith.
That said, H kept his appt with C yesterday. It took some restraint on my part, but I refrained from hounding him about it--I quickly reminded him in the morning before he left for work and that was it. I don't know how it went, etc. H's only comment was "Counseling is definitely for you." He has said many times before that he doesn't think it will do him any good, and I realize that it likely will not if he isn't interested in truly participating. Regardless, his effort to actually go shows that he really is willing to do a lot for our R. And that means a lot to me.
So I continue on, keeping my eyes open, but giving him the benefit of the doubt. I'll just keep working on me and enjoying the positives--things are 500% better today than they were three years ago. My hope is that in three more years, I can say the same thing!
