And the fact that he doesn't want "to go there" again should encourage him to be transparent
EXACTLY! I found a great tool for me was to bring up things I felt were really important in the MC's office.
Also, I do honestly recommend you pick up the book I mentioned and ask him to read it. If for no other reason but to understand YOUR perspective in all of this. It's not an attack on him or anything like that but MANY cheating spouses truly underestimate what we as betrayed spouses go through and how long the effects last.
