I haven't told my W about this since I know she will deny it and so will he - so what's the point in letting the cat outta the bag? But because she did this, and I don't see any remorse on her part, I am not sure I want to continue in this M. I'm starting to detach, calming down a bit, and seeing this for what it is. I just ask myself - how can I prevent this from happening again? I think I know the answer - either by having a solid M, or divorce, right? I think those are my 2 choices since I will not just "let this go"....it will happen again - that's my fear.
this is how I see it, sol.
I'm zero tolerance in the lie department. so you can let her know that you know and not debate it, let her deny, but all you're doing is being honest. who cares if she denies, at least one of you is being honest.
as far as being worried about her doing it again, thats a judgement call. if she denies and keeps treating you like crap, chances are probably good for a repeat performance. if she is contrite, say, like UA is, well then it's something that can be worked through.
know what I mean?
UA, sorry I dropped your name here, but you're a perfect example of someone who slipped up and deserves another chance.
