Whore/Madonna Syndrome

[Heywyre]

Ok so we go to the C today. Things must be getting better because we pretty much have a BS session and we both walk out of there thinking "he should be paying us"

C tells us how he likes the dynamics between us, how we banter back and forth and compliment each other. However, he does want to explore those "dynamics" a little more and how we are the same but how we are also different and how that affects the R. So next week's session should be interesting.

I also go by myself on Monday, which should be interesting because I am already stressed out about it. Here's the deal ...

H and I were in a car accident about 4 years ago. My claim has settled, H's hasn't. He has to go for a specialist appointment in the city where OW lives. Now the good thing is, he is flying there so he won't have a vehicle to drive to her place etc. However, I guess if he REALLY wanted to, he could find a way right? Or he could call her and she'd pick him up. I know, I know - I shouldn't be thinking that way and I have to stop my mind from wandering

I need some advice here - he knows I am stressed out about this and he has tried to reassure me that he is feeling a lot stronger with the AD and knows it won't bother him going there. Wish I could say the same thing about me. He's leaving at about 5 in the morning and won't be home until about 8 pm and then he has to leave at 11:30 to go to work (another thing I am concerned about with him not getting enough sleep). Is there anything I can say to him to reassure him about "us" - or is this just me freaking out without reason? I really, really hate how I am feeling right now

The only good thing about this is I get to vent at the C on Monday. Which is a whole other story. We will probably talk about the Madonna/Whore complex again. H doesn't know we talked about that, nor does he know I gave a copy of the article to the C - I am sure he will want to address that.

Also, H called to talk to a couple of people in this family he used to know when he was a kid. Their father died and he wanted to express his condolences - nice gesture right? Well, they said their mother was having a 75th birthday party this summer and they invited him and said it would be good to see him - also a nice thing right? Well, this 75 year old woman is the woman he lost his virginity to!! From the sounds of things, she was a little bit of a wild woman and had a large number of kids, several from other men in the community, although she stayed married to the same guy. I don't know if I can go to a function like that, knowing what I know.

And just when I thought my life was getting easier