I am a very logical kind of person, but not as bad as Spock. I don' t see the world in various shades of gray (thus why women baffle me). To me if things are still gray, you just have not divided the problem fine enough to get to black and white.
I think this may be one of your biggest obstacles to overcome. It may be a prerequisite step before you can even start working on becoming a good fisherman. If you cannot appreciate the subtleties in the opinions of women, how are you to understand them and know what it is about you that turns them off? How do you know what skills you need to refine?
A woman may see a dozen things in you that bother her, each a different shade of gray, but to you, those issues are all white because they are not gray enough to fall into the black category. So you cannot see your flaws because you choose to blind yourself. Yet all the while others are pointing to all those gray spots. You then reach the false conclusion that fish may not come to the bait.
There is no way to classify everything as black or white CeMar. When you do this, it sends the message that you think another’s opinion of gray is not valid. That will make the person either become defensive or shut down. Either way it is going to prevent them from wanting to recognize any improvement you may do on your fishing skills and you will be guaranteed not to catch any fish. You will have kept the fish away yourself because even your bait is not enticing enough for them to bite at it.
Over analyzing and dissecting things can be just another form of controlling your world. Take it from me, and as hard as it may be to believe, I still do this. Why do you need to control your world? What is it that scares you? Why is it so uncomfortable for you to accept a shade of gray?
Deida does talk about pursueing our goals even if it causes hardship on the family. I know there are other careers out there that might actually be my purpose, but to get there would rwquire more schooling and would cause great financial hardship on the whole family, and I can't do that to them.
Why do you keep bringing up this idea of changing careers? I never said anything about that. I thought your “goal” was to have your W desire you. Your career is only a part of that. I advised you to view your career as a means to develop yourself into a master fisherman. Your goal should be the master fisherman, the reward is your catch (your W’s desire for you) and your career is just a tool.
What I was trying to get to with the whole fish thing is that their are many fish out there that can't respond. Women lose their desire for MANY reasons, and MOST of the reasons have nothing to do with the fisherman and how he fishes. So if I make myself more attractive, this won't do a whole lot for a women whose problems are phsycial or with herself. I already KNOW that my wife has a lot of physical issues to contend with.
You still haven’t given any specifics about the physical problems your W has. What are they?
