Are you still in the same house? You sound like your being a pushover. What kind of guy accepts his wife going on dates while still living with him? The very act of putting up with it is unattractive and pursuing, it says in actions louder than words, "I'm so desperate for you that I'm willing to look the other way while you date." You are guilty of believing her lives. Of course she wants to be more than friends. The only thing probably holding her back is this other guy isn't that interested in a relationship with her.
If it were me I'd ask her to move out.
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
