Meet with your wife, have some pizza, make some jokes. When testimonial time comes around, be all about straight up man talk, no embellishing, just the straight scoop..
--- "Wife. I understand you are going through a rough time. I have been as well.
I have worked with the doctors to figure out what my problem was (WAS, not IS). I WAS having issues with my testosterone levels. That has now been corrected.
I realize that I can't make you do anything. You are your own person. I am, however, asking you to consider that I HAD a physical issue that has now been corrected. That puts me in a position now, to be able to address and correct ALL emotional issues between us, even the ones caused by my physical deficiency. I am ready and willing to do that. I am asking (NO PLEADING) that you give me a chance to address those issues by working with me on our marriage.
That is all I will say so that you don't feel unduly pressured. I am more than willing to openly and honestly answer any questions that you may have." ---
If she cries, offer your shoulder from a position of strength. If she latches on to you, hold her tight and offer her reassurance. Keep your tears to yourself. Be the rock.
This is about HER, not you. I understand that your feelings are hurt and that you are devastated, regardless, she is the one feeling great BETRAYAL in the marriage. Do NOT expect her to offer you comfort. If she is to return to you, it is you that must start the healing of the marriage. If you are expecting her to come rushing in to the rescue, then put off the meeting until you can man-up.
All the best, -NOPkins-
I will ferret out an affair at any opportunity.
-An affair is the embodiment of entitlement, fueled by resentment and lack of respect. -An infidel will remain unreachable so long as their sense of entitlement exceeds their ability to reason.
