Thanks for the replies and the insights and for sharing your own stories with me. It does help to hear that others are going through a similar roller coaster ride.
I know some say not to share too much with the in-laws, but believe me, they are my rock right now. They are my cheerleaders, my helpers, and a huge part of my support group.
I am following the advice in Michelle's DR book, and they are very supportive of that, also, though my MIL says she doesn't think she could have ever been that strong!!
I'm trying to detach from H and his problems, but it is very, very, very difficult for me. I am seeing a psychiatrist/marriage counselor, and he is very supportive and thinks I am on the right track. It would just help if I could see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Thanks again, and look forward to chatting with more of you and learning more in the days, weeks, months (please, God, not years) to come.
Me:40, xH:41 M:19 T:21 D14, S10, D6 IDLYA bomb:12/22/06 OW bomb (21 yr. old employee):12/23/06 H move out 2/07, OW move in 5/07 D papers served 6/07 D final Nov. 26, 08 :-(