What I got from Dieda was that the man’s role in a marriage was to provide the solid foundation and security for the family that comes from successful pursuit of his “purpose.” That purpose can be his career, or a sideline career that he is developing, like building a new business on the side, supported by his day job. But it should be something the man believes in or is devoted to. A church career or missionary work might fit this role.
What I did NOT hear is that the man’s purpose is to serve the woman to try and make her happy. That is a losing game because her happiness is emotion based and can change as easily as her emotions change. The solidity of the man’s purpose is something the woman envies and needs for her own stability, so the main responsibility of the man in regard to the marriage is to share his stability, his success, and the fruits of his success with his woman.
This does not mean the man should choose a pursuit designed to make the woman happy (because her definition of “happiness” can change). I know you said you do a lot of chores around the house, help out with the kids, etc., which is required to keep a sense of fairness in the M, but can you tell me how those chores fit in with YOUR purpose? What is your purpose? What is your dream? Don’t tell me it is to get your W to desire you.
CeMar, it seems you keep confusing cause and effect. The EFFECT you want is to have your W desire you. That is a result of you creating the conditions to allow her create that effect. If you do not create those conditions (the cause), she will not respond with the effect. You seem to want the “effect” without putting forth the “cause.” Can you understand what I am saying? You focus on the “effect” because it seems so logical to you, but if you flowchart the path that leads to “effect,” with the understanding that you cannot get to “effect” without first going through “cause,” you will see that you are not doing your part.
Just as an aside CeMar, have you ever been diagnosed as having autistic or Asperger’s like symptoms? Do you have trouble reading subtle clues from people or “reading between the lines?”
Also, I agree with Corri. Drop the annoyance and anger.
