Yet all the signs are there that for some reason he soesn't want to live w/ her or have something more serious w/ her.
I missed the manual on "Signs of not wanting her".....not being rude to you but a guy can make whatever "signs" he wants when the time is right....especially if it looks like he is not getting his way or things are not going the way he wants.
You are right to tell him to move in with the Jerry Springer chick.....because if that is not what he wanted then why is he still getting it?
I know your getting your beauty sleep so I will leave you w/ this- I love your Jerry Springer discription b/c evn though I don't know what she looks like, I do know she is a redneck(sorry not to put all of yous down) and my one and only convo w/ her she said "well, he is not the only one w/ promblems ya know, I have a lot of promblems myself" She is single and w/ a girl my daughter's age who they use to play together at daddy's work when the skank use to work w/ him.
Question- I made a comment last night regarding him beign "in love w/her" and he said no we are past that point??? WHat is that? How does one know if it is purely just a sexual thing? Since he did get closer to her (before the EA) when I stopped talking and having sex w/ him.
Are there men out there who can tell me (from experience) if you can seperate btw the physical and the emotional? Since us women can't do it the same way for the most part.
What you were doing was working. You can't give in when he approaches you though. You have to continue to be aloof and unavailable to him. The minute you give in and have sex with him you've essentially said, "I need you so much that I don't care where you %^#@ has been". I'm sure that there are laws that allow for child support to be set up despite not being divorced.
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
JM, to what r u refering to that was working? Can u answer the question from above? What did he mean by we r past that point? The point of "in love"?
H knows I was always a stickler for safe sex and before I use to say out of anger that I hoped his "thing" falls off. After ( I know too late) we had sex, I asked him if I should be concerned b/c I did not make him wear protection ( I know he's not going to say yeah sure!). He said why? do you have them around? H said it w/ that look of - oh why do YOU need them?
Chicki, From a mans perspective absolutely we can seperate physical from emotional. Hello, did you never get laid and then dumped in high school? No offense to any women on these boards but guys grow up with the aspect that some women are simply a piece of as$. Girls don't get reps for sleeping around unless they have. Guys target them because there is no emotional connection, your just dipping your wick so to speak.
I played ball in high school and college and I can tell you that there was no emotional connection for me until I met my Wife. Every other woman I was with was simply a piece of as$ to me. Yes, I dated seriously, but it was not a huge emotional thing, I could go on without them if need be. Sometimes a woman can be worth more effort if she is hard to land so you tolerate more to get what you want.
Now once a man has that emotional connection, he is hooked on it. Your H is f^cking this other woman, plain and simple. He is not making love to her, he's screwing her. That's what he's trying to tell you. Why, who the hell knows, my best bet would be that he is just lost and acting like a high school boy right now. How old is he anyway? He's telling you that it's not love, he said they are past that point, that means that the initial euphoria of the R is gone and he has realized that he conquered her. Got what he wanted and is now simply riding that out. He's not connected to her, doesnt want to marry her, just having his fling. Guess what, as long as you keep tolerating it, he will keep getting laid.
It's kind of on you now Chickie, lay down the gauntlet and see how he handles it. It is unnacceptable for him to be screwing someone else and living with you, plain and simple. He won't leave, BS, there's a way to get him out if need be. Figure it out.
