I think that forgiveness is a gift, but someone that just accepts bad behavior without recourse is disrespecting themselves. If you don't respect yourself, then others with a demonstrated lack of boundaries such as your husband, will simply treat you as a doormat.
One way to regain some of your perceived loss of respect, is to simply state your boundaries to your husband. Something like; "Hubby, I have been patient through all of your uncertainties and infidelities. I have changed myself and done my level best to address issues that I have created in the marriage. Having done so, I must respectfully inform you that I simply will not tolerate any additional infidelities. I love you, but that is the way it has to be in order for me to continue in the marriage."
If he finds that unacceptable, then consider yourself as having saved years of your life that would have otherwise been spent in misery.
All the best, -NOPkins-
I will ferret out an affair at any opportunity.
-An affair is the embodiment of entitlement, fueled by resentment and lack of respect. -An infidel will remain unreachable so long as their sense of entitlement exceeds their ability to reason.
