ok so here's an example of bad dbing on my part but what a weird reaction by h.
I offered to fold and stuff this months bills for h's business, (i used to do it all the time til preg with #2 then job went off to new sil) so h accepted and brought the bills home yesterday. well when I started folding I gave h ow's bill and asked that he do something with it so that I wouldn't be tempted to do something nasty with it. h took it and ripped it up in little peices and put it in the trash? well say's I, now how will you get paid? h says I'll just print up a new copy. and that was that.
so again an evening of no lovin'. h watched football and eventually at 11 I went to bed. then more bad dbing? I went back down and let him know that I feel that the main cause of our problems is that our sex drives don't match. that I want it more than he does, that I get angry, resentful, depressed, feel unatractive, un-feminie etc. then all the little things become a source of frustration to me. basically the conversation just got no where til h just said "you're just misserable" well I responded to that with " no youre the misserable one, I am letting you know as I have let you know so many times in the past what I see as a source of our problems and instead of wanting to do something about it you just tell me I'm misserable. if you continue to want to ignore this very real problem and make it my problem alone I can assure you that this r will be at risk.
so looking forward to michelles new book. hoping that h actually heard me (sometimes he says nothing or says something stupid like "your misserable" and then takes possitive action later without words) so well just wait and see.
I really want this r to work out in a way that we can both be happy and not have to fully compromise who we each are to make it work.
