It's pretty clear to me that the "neediness" that made Chrome have EAs is also the "neediness" that is preventing him from moving forward in getting a sex life. As LFL indicated what they both wanted from their interaction was validation, not hot monkey sex. So it's a classic Schnarchian example of need for validation getting in the way of basic sexuality. What if the character of Tony Soprano as pictured on last months Vanity Fair and Chrome did a wife swap? Tony might cheat on Mrs.Chrome if she remained LD but I seriously doubt that he'd be having an EA, probably just the opposite because Tony would feel like he was entitled to some p*ssy, not some affection or validation or emotional intimacy. So maybe the thing that is always signals "bad" behavior in a relationship is simply the sense of entitlement coupled with dishonesty and it doesn't really matter what it is that you feel entitled to, could be hot monkey sex or a few more than a few drinks or another baby your spouse wasn't in favor of etc.etc.etc. It's easy to figure out what the opposite of dishonesty is. IMO, it's harder to figure out what is the opposite of entitlement. If you say "I deserve it" that still kind of smacks of entitlement with some sort of moral justification or rationalization attached. I think pretty much you just gotta go with "I WANT IT." and you gotta say it out loud in order to be completely honest.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
