Working through today. I'm making it a goal right now not to call or contact her. I think one mistake I have made in piecing things back together is rushing into areas we aren't prepared for. Mort Fertel and other authors recommend making deposits throughout the day. A brief phone call or e-mail, that type of thing.
I think where I messed up was in assuming that my R was ready to go there. It wasn't.
Some authors recommend a 10 second kiss at least once a day, 5 positive contacts and on and on. I really believe that is optimal. In a good R, or even a almost good R, that approach would be just the ticket. In one like mine, some days I'm lucky if she will hug me, let alone a 10 second liplock filled with passion and fervor. In my current sitch, by the 3rd attempt at a positive contact via phone, I can hear in her voice that she doesn't want to answer and the whole "be first to get off the phone" DB principle? I don't even have time, she is sprinting for her 'end call' button she wants off so bad.
Maybe in a few months or a year, but for now, those are all great ideas just not for my R. If anything they set me back due to it being perceived as pressuring and chasing.
