oh hon, I'm sorry you are on limbo again, hugs)))))))))
============= 1. Figure out why I am jealous of his FF ============== Because you are a normal woman!!! I can't think of any woman I know who thinks it is ok for her H to come and go and hang out with FF all the time! I'd be royally PO'd if my H did that, you were so good to him and patient, he just wants to live the life of a bachelor. Either he is in a mini MLC or when he was away (physically/mentally) he hung out w/the care free crowd who dont' give a hoot about anything and who party all the time.
============ Figure out why I haven't gotten our house decluttered (This is major reason he said he wasn't happy in our marriage. I thought that was a pretty surface reason. Maybe I'm avoiding having a clean house so if he says he wants a divorce I won't feel it's about ME....just the lack of my housecleaning skills). =========== Unless you were the cat lady who hoarded 120+ cats I dont' think he has grounds to say that is the reason why he wasnt' happy, that is BS, he just wants to "live it up" like a teenager. My H is a pack rat and as a typical ADHDer he has "piles" everywhere in the house--but I would never attribute my H's messiness w/our troubles even if it does make me unconfortable.
My H never did care for neatness since his parents were neat freaks and drove him crazy, thus he ended on the other side of the spectrum (his room was so cluttered you could not see the floor, there was 2 feet of "stuff" all over. I try to give him bookcases for his stuff, and periodically grab a bag and toss stuff I know is 100% trash (old receipts of food, wrappers, ect). Same when I clean my home, w/my 2 kids and endlless junk I walk around w/3 plastic bags, one for trash, one for stuff that doesn't belong there (spoons, tools) and one bag for toys.
Go to the container store and buy some neat organizers, and if you have not used something for over a few months, stuff it in a box and drop it at the nearest thrift shop.
Hang in there gal, hope he grows up and stop pointing fingers at you.
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
