ask him to leave?--men especially

[stubborn]

Instead of "telling" him what to do how about asking him what he "plans" to do. You can even phrase it as "I know you'd never make a decision like this lightly, and since you've let me know what you'd like (OW) could you let me know what you plan to do next?" (practice it several times first.) That way you get some tip as to what cards he thinks he is holding.

Spread the "I know you're intelligent and wouldn't make decisions lightly" all over anything you say. Think of it as affirmations that you send out into the universe, you don't always believe it at the time you're saying it. Obviously you know he's nuts but hey, let him think you respect him. It sets him up to "think" he made any decisions, therefore he can't resent you for "throwing him out". Put it back on him.