Remember that although it takes two to tango (or not tango) you can only take responsibility for your half of the dance. I don't know the details of your situation but let's say you had issues with work stress and ED that were inhibiting your sexuality. You would be far better off saying to your W "Since our separation it has become clear to me that I do value sexuality. Therefore, I am taking actions a,b and c to deal with my work stress and I am taking actions d,e and f to deal with my ED.". This is what I mean about taking actions that would be rational if you were considering the prospect of dating or being sexual with any woman, not just your wife.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
