You know my H has told me for years literally, but I just did not listen the way I should have. That is why I am in this state right now. Along with that he has all these repressed feelings building up.
You have to really think about it. Is there anything he complained about that you just ignored because you thought he was trying to be difficult? There are things my husband has said to me that I sort of brushed off but now I see he needed me to hear him. I figured one out from reading the five languages of love. My H every now and then would tell me that other people would tell him nice things but not me. This is not something he mentioned recently but when I read that book, I remembered. I realized that he needed words of affirmation from his wife. I have been trying to work on that one. I do almost all the others, but I have a hard time with that one. I thought he knew how I felt. I tried writing him a letter but boy does that burn him up. He wants to hear it.
I see you mentioned the fighting. That is good, you are changing how you react to him. That is a start. So keep that up.
Right now the main thing my H wants from me is space and trust. I am to leave him alone and trust him. So I have. It sucks though. I miss him and we live in the same house. I have to stick to my guns though and leave him in peace or else he is not going to see the changes as true.
