should I give her my copy -- the one I've marked up as I read it. No, if she is going to think you are trying to manipulate her.
May spouses see what they want to see. Some spouses see what you are trying to say, but that is not all that common.
Do what NOP suggested first. Measure her reaction, then proceed.
CM34 said it you just have to show, over time, that you are committed and that the changes are permanent ones. It takes a lot of time & patience on your part.
