Piecing Advice

[Rob1231]

Yeah, yeah, that's what the MC said. But STILL...I mean, COME ON. I've changed. I've risked TONS....so now it's his darn turn. I'm tired of having all the responsibility here. Put on your big boy pants! He'll never know if he doesn't try.

I get you there, SD. I really do. Sometimes I get so frustrated, waiting for W to recommit in some obvious way. You know, I can still count the ILY's I've gotten since she "came back" on one hand. And I still don't dole them out much myself - because I don't want to ever hear her say ILY as an automatic, unfelt response to my own ILY again. I'll wait for it to be genuine - but I agree, COME ON.

I hoped that Piecing would be more about leaps and bounds forward than continuing the occasional baby steps. But, it is what it is. I do see baby steps - lots of them, really.

I have to think, from what you've said, that you are seeing some too. Not as many as you would like, not as frequent as you would like, but... they are there, aren't they?

Well hell, I KNOW that. I know it's crazy, I know it's stupid. I see it as proof I'm not over that whole issue...and H can't figure out why I'm not. He's still got trust to earn back. I'm trying...but his behavior lately has just sent up some flags for me.

I know you know! And you just about said it yourself - this is more about your lingering issues than about him. I'll say it again - his behavior did change in this instance. He didn't bottle up his anger forever, just long enough to have a nice vacation with you and then come back to discuss it later. I'll bet he thought that WAS an improvement! Unfortunately, it wasn't the improvement that you wanted to see - but don't give him zero credit. Give him "half credit".

Possibly right now, he's thinking he'll never satisfy you, because even when he tries he ends up pissing you off. Could be?

I'll give it a few days and try to post the good stuff. Honestly, right now I just don't want to. I'm tired and annoyed. It's his turn to worry, his turn to pursue me. I want more.

SD

Take your time, sweetie. You DO deserve more. MUCH more. We all do. I think it'll come, if you let it. ((((SD))))