Piecing Advice

[Rob1231]

Hi SD,

I'm sorry you had this downer, but I have faith that you'll be back on top of things soon. Now, I want to play devil's advocate for you a little here...

First, I'd had no clue, and I always know when he's ticked, so I felt like he was just getting better at hiding things from me.

OK, let's talk about this. There are a couple of interpretations here. First, H is letting his anger simmer until your relationship goes south as a result - that's what you're assuming is the deal, based on things that were problems in The Bad Old Days.

Second, I was upset that he hadn't addressed the problem when it came up. Granted, he didn't let it affect the rest of the trip and he did bring it up in MC, but it brought up everything from the bomb for me.

OK, gave the second interpretation of what happened yourself, right here. H didn't sit on this forever - he sat on it until MC. Isn't it possible that he didn't bring it out right at the moment, in the middle of the trip, because he wanted your vacation together to go well? Perhaps he didn't understand what your reaction to his waiting would be - he thought it would be better to let the vacation be fun and happy, and then bring up his issue in the "safe" environment of MC later on? Obviously, that backfired on him pretty badly - but you are assuming a LOT of bad stuff based on one incident of poor communication.

And as for snooping - well, now, FoundGirl, I shouldn't have to tell you about that at all! We went through too much of that together, back in the rough days. Let that go. Look at what you found out - from an outsider's point of view, it's totally and completely inconclusive, and you've built a case on top of it so big that you're ending with your post with "I'll file the papers myself." C'mon, SD. You're better than that. Shake it off - I know you can.

H and I went off for our first big trip since the bomb. We spent 10 days together in Guatemala, successfully. Trips have always breeded problems for a variety of reasons, and this was a good one. It was fun! A few rough patches, but waaay better than in the past.

OK, having chastised you a bit, I want to get back to the good stuff. This sounds FABULOUS. Here's an assignment for you! I want a nice post, at least as long as this one, telling me everything TERRIFIC about this vacation! OK?