Hi cat03. I've been working on something Chuck mentioned which is to use the words, I regret. I do regret the way things have gone, although a lot of the things that she lays at my feet now are not entirely true. Rather than argue or defend myself, I simply listen and then say, I regret _____ has caused/made you feel this way. I have to work on making sure she knows I'm not mad or angry. The last few days the most common thing she has said to me has to do with me being "mad" about things or upset.
She wants to go places without me, she doesn't want to spend any time with me. That is pretty much what she wants to do.LOL. She went to a concert with her friend Friday night and next weekend she is going out of town to spend time with a friend in Detroit. I have to work on making sure she knows its cool with me and I don't have any issues with this. Of course I wish she would want to do these same things with me, but its just not how things are at this point.
She won't go to MC with me, no way. I've asked, she said we tried it, (3 sessions and it did suck, the C wasn't very good, lots of, "how did you relate to your mother?" type stuff) and she isn't interested in going back. Part of her resolve to just end this and move on.
