Well, I've been here for 19 days and it feels like 19 months. It's getting difficult. We literally only have some clothes with us; MIL's house isn't the largest; and she's got her way of doing things. I feel bad for the kids. I'm having real difficulties finding a place to live. It's so rural around here, it dawned on me that everyone here - lives here, know what I mean? The rental market is virtually non-existent. I don't know what I'm going to do. I've been going downhill emotionally, getting very depressed.
SO finally went for a colonoscopy yesterday. According to him, they found lots of perforations on his large intestine and he needs surgery ASAP. But, this all 2nd hand info from a known misrepresenter of the truth, lol, so who knows.
Today, he's insisting that he take the kids Saturday night until Sunday. Even though he's got to work Saturday night until 1 AM and they'll be with a "sitter" from 4 PM. I told him I'd get back to him. We have court Monday regarding custody issues. I don't trust him. I KNOW - OT, before you even say it. I have no control over some things he does with the kids. However, he has proven quite untrustworthy when it comes to them and I'm very inclined to say no until we see what happens at court.
I don't know what to do and I hate that he's trying to pressure me into acquiescing. I've repeatedly asked him for a schedule and all he answers with is when he has to work. NOT with when he wants to see (or have) the kids. As a matter of fact, he's only seen them twice since we've been here. Easter, when he told 3 different stories on what time he'd be here (eventually showing up at noon and leaving at 2:30, taking D8 with him) and then the next day when he brought D8 back and fell asleep on the couch. A couple of times, he's told D8 he would come over, but then changed his mind. That's wrong. I hate when he does that to her. I'm really not trying to be a controlling b!tch about this, but I'm not comfortable with his "pick & choose" attitude and then spring it on me the day before, expecting me to instantly agree with him. And when I don't give him the answer he wants to hear, he accuses me of being "difficult" and trying to keep the kids from him. The old no-win situation.
As for him, he still calls/emails me many times per day. No, I don't always answer or respond. Got the old "I miss you & the kids" the other day. Whatever the hell that means. He "says" things; misses me, leaves messages on my cell in the middle of the night; hints, flirts around things - but there's no substance, if you know what I mean. So, whatever.
Mine & the kids stuff is all still at his house. I need to get it out. I'm not comfortable with whomever he's got in the house being able to pick through my stuff. He swears no one's been there, but, as I know, most everything he says is not really the truth. I just don't want to have to move everything twice, that's why I've been delaying getting the stuff out. It's not like I'd be bringing it here; it all has to go into storage (even though for free, but at his brothers house). So, ??, what to do.
D8 is enrolled in her new school. That tore me up. I actually cried when I left her there. It sickens me that this has happened. All in all, she seems to be adjusting to it OK. The work is on par with what she had in her old school; actually a little behind it seems. D4 is doing the worst. Always asking about Daddy. Behavior difficulties. She misses school. She's bored here all day. D2 also constantly asks & cries about Daddy. I get so mad about it sometimes. Then, it makes me sad & I cry. One extreme to the other.
It feels like everything is on hold in my life until I find a place to live. It's so rural here, something could come up clear across the county, and that will determine where I work and where I put the two little one's in daycare. I know, better days are coming, but it certainly doesn't feel like it right now.
