As I posted before, I talked w/ W's C and what a treat that was. Well I went ahead and told W I did so..Not much of a reaction from her. I told her I was finally starting to understand where she was coming from. Before I even said anything else, W replied," you don't C do you." Told W it's not that I don't like and I don't blame C for W's actions right now. But C needs to get a clue about telling people it's okay to better themselves by abandoning their responsibilities. She shouldn't be counseling people that if they don't like how their life has turned out b/c of their own decisions to just get up and walk out. After listening to C and her philosophy and seeing what W's approach, comments and actions have been that the C has done nothing but reinforce the behavior. C has convinced W it's ok to runaway from her responsibilty. I told W I never would have guessed that as much as she wanted to be a W and a M, that she would run away from things just b/c they got tough. Probably wasn't the thing to say, but I'm tired of W living in her own little dream world. She didn't say anymore to me. The next morning things were definitely tense. I didn't expect anything different. Later that day W had to bring S8 down to my office. She was actually friendly & acted as if she was still my W. If you'd taken a 15 min. picture you would have never known we're in the process of getting D. W has been better @ "as if" than I am. She just keeps going about like everything is normal.
That night when putting S's to bed, S8 was real sad. I walked in to his room and he was just laying on his bad. When I asked him what was wrong, he said M acts like she doesn't want me around as much as S3. W has always paid more attention to S3 since he was born. She will ignore S8 to play w/ S3. I passed on this conv. on to W. At first she got defensive, then thanked me for bringing it to her attention.
Yesterday W even called me. It's the first time in about a week that she called me @ work. Did so just to tell me she was waiting for S8 to get out of school so they could head to practice. Its really wierd. Most of the time she won't even speak time, whether she intiates it or in response to me. Every now and then she surprises me by doing something like this (calling me for no reason). Last night when W and S's got home from pratice S8 walks in the door crying. S8 said M had been yelling @ him and told him to be quiet when he was asking her a question. She's doing this more and more, like last summer. W doesn't see that she treats everyone like their an annoyance. After I got S8 calmed down, he asked me if I would talk to M. After the boys were in bed, I approached W and asked if we could talk. I told her S8 had asked me to talk w/ her. I was very calm & made sure I didn't come off as being her "parent". I told her I just wanted let her know how S8 was feling and what he had said. Right away she started playing the martyr roll. She'd have to change her behavior b/c she knew she was ruin S8 and how it was all her fault.. It doesn't make a diffence how I try talk w/ her , she either takes that route or says I'm being too critical of her. I can't win.
