I forgot to answer one of your questions.

Starting the conversation.

In a face forward bold but not overbearing stance, face open, simply ask him the question without a lot of pre-qualifiers (no "you know I love you but...").

All the best,
-NOPkins-


I will ferret out an affair at any opportunity.

-An affair is the embodiment of entitlement, fueled by resentment and lack of respect.
-An infidel will remain unreachable so long as their sense of entitlement exceeds their ability to reason.