YoYo, Your pain is so evident on the boards. There is a grieving process we LBS have to go thru. I hope it's getting easier for you with each passing month, and that you feel like you're getting stronger. I know that you're working on not pursuing him, maintaining positive connection, and GAL activities.
What are your greatest fears at this time? You seem like you're such a strong person, but something is keeping you from detaching from the situation, and accepting the state of your M. What are you afraid to face? What are you having trouble accepting?
You seem to be looking for the right strategy that will make things better, and bring him back. You're doing a good job of maintaining positive connections with him, rather than allowing anger/resentment to get in the way. The missing piece is addressing your inner turmoil, so that you can relax more into the situation.
Detaching from the situation, doesn't mean that you're giving-up. It's relating to the situation in a way that is healthy for you, and gives him the space to work-thru whatever he's struggling with.
CL
CL 53 W 54 M 20 yrs. 03'-09' Separation + Old Patterns + GAL 10-14' Piecing
"The Master allows things to happen. She shapes events as they come."
